31 lipca 2004, 18:36
but people change. i lost my edge a while ago and can't even recall when. but at some point it did happen, like all shit happens.
k brings me to earth. he's earthy, i could say. i'm not. it's hard for me to follow a set path. i need my clifs, rivers and black holes. i need to go out, get stoned with some strangers and lay down on a grass looking at nightsky talking about how awsome it is to have five fingers. i need to come home, get high and dance while listening to some frech chick singing and drinking vine. i need a whole lot more. but without having to ask for permission. it just takes most out of it. i am my own person. and im used to deciding & doing crap without anyones supervission. it hard.i do understand, that a relationship means compromise. and i wouldn't do anything to lose what we have right now, cuz i do believe he is the best thing i've got in this life. it's just, sometimes i don't think he understands how much those things mean to me, how much i need it to stay sane.